Today‚Äôs best Facebook statuses currently being used by my friends (on Facebook that is) are listed below. It’s been raining cats & dogs here in Nashville today so people are freakin out.
(names will remain anonymous)
1.) “says “what up Thunderstorms?! Say hello to your mother for me” – (She’s very nice.)
2.) “Wow the bears have a quarterback” – (DA’ BEARS!)
3.) “is wishing this stinkin pink eye would heal!” – (What’s it smell like?)
4.) “getting my 3rd wind.” – (Just don’t break it this time.)
5.) “why did i try to drive in a tornado?” – (Maybe you just like to drive real fast in circles?)
6.) “just drove through what felt like a waterfall… scary.” – (You drivin’ thru the touchless car wash again?)
7.) “why i love lisa: “where the F is my ark!!”” – (How does she keep losing her ark? Its probably just floating around somewhere, I hope the animals didn’t jump out.)
8.) “It’s raining…BOO” – (We want to join you in booing the rain, so BOO!!!! BOO!!! Bow down to her, bow down to the queen of slime, the queen of muck, the queen of Putrescence. Boo. Boo. Rubbish. Filth. Slime. Muck.)
9.) “TOT in Aspen-“where the beer flows like wine and women flock instinctively like the salmon of Capistrano” – (So I want to go somewhere, where we know someone who can plug us into the social pipeline.)
10.) “is thinking this sweet girl image has got to go!” – (Is this a Brittany Spears quote from like 10 years ago?)
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