Why is it, tell me, why is it that the tables have to be sticky at almost every dining establishment?? I go to place my arms on the table and yuck, a gross a me out a. My arms are now sticky. Greeeeaaat, just greeaat.
Now I have to test the tables before I set anything down. The sticky tables have ruined my trust in the establishment to procure the resting of not only my body, but also my cellphone, not to mention my silverware! Thankfully, most silverware is wrapped in paper or cloth, and then after I remove it I carefully place the fork on top of the knife if I am not going to use the knife, and if I am going to use the knife, I place it on a plate, and if there is no plate I place it on paper, and if there is no paper I say, “screw it, let the germs have their way”.
So let me make a couple of recommendations to you about what you should do when you are confronted with sticky tables at restaurants:
A) Do not touch the table the whole time. Only allow the bottom of the plate and glass to touch the table.
B) Ask the waiter or waitresss to wipe the table off. Typically this doesn’t work very well because they wipe it off and it remains sticky. There needs to be some decent elbow grease put into the action. Typically, there are oily fingers touching the tables before we sat down, and for that we need a mildly soapy wipe down.
C) At an informal establishment (which is usually where this problem occurs), I find it completely acceptable to spread out a napkin before you on the table. In fact, spread two or three napkins, that way you can have an area to place your arms and phone (considering you do not like to keep your phone in your pocket).
D) Spit shine it.
When I am at Whole Foods or a coffee shop, I usually find myself going with option C, depending on the severity and the type of establishment I will go with option B, and yes, I have gone with option A on occasion. I have never gone with option D, but I almost want to, sometime my friend, sometime.
And there you have it! Have you?
