I know there are a lot of you out there that think I am already a loser… but to you I say, you are right, I have no gaming skills. So why did I play fantasy football? Well, at first it was to see what the fuss was all about, then it grew into fun and made me love football even more. I have been playing now for 4 years roughly and I have never won or even placed for that matter. Is it because I haven’t picked the right quarterback? Or maybe not the right defense, because defense wins games. Maybe because I don’t drink enough coffee, coffee is the life blood that fuels champions.
Whatever the reason, I cannot seem to win this game, which leads me to this conspiracy, IT’S RIGGED!! I am a pawn in a group of fellahs who just needed a sixth person to make it even and they are out to make me lose every year. It’s deep, I know, but I have noticed a couple things that give me reason to believe this:
– Same commissioner every year
– The commissioner never loses, and neither does his brother or brother-in-law, well maybe once but that didn’t count
Ok, that’s pretty much all I got, but I am still sure its fixed and they are out to make sure I lose every year. So what do I do about this problem? Well, right now I have to buy the beer for the poker night after we buy the winner his dinner. But next time I am going to quit my job and study everyday watching ESPN and reading the sports section of the paper. Maybe I will even hire a fantasy coach to get me through with some smacks to my face and mindless shots to the groin.
Well, whatever I do I am going to place next year, 3rd place I am coming for you! So hold out your hands like I am your long lost lover finally coming home, just like I dreamed it last night.